perhaps that's true.

no one uds, not even myself.

i'm not being of any help at all.

i cant even help myself let alone others.

i'm lost. i dunno what to do.

seems like i'm bringing more problems than being of any help.

studies is important, this i know.

but there are also other things that are as impt.

a life revolving around studying is not i want.

i dont like studying. but who knows.

why do all think i like it just becos they always see me sitting there studying.

pics that make me smile? no thanks.

no point. its life span will be short.

alright. maybe i should go back to my books now.

bury myself in them.

till i go gaga one day.

then i'd be in a world of my own.

if only..

i'm not being emo. i dont even know what i want.

what i wrote.

my hands did it. i'm not controlling it. my brain did.

my brain? sure it's mine?

open it up and verify then. see if it has my name on it.

alright. thats not funny. i really dunno what i'm typing now.

shall stop then.. before it goes on and on and on and on...

-numbed

alright people, i'm back.. lol

my com is finally working..

well. for now..

aint sure if it's going to work for tmr and the subsequent days as well.

well.. i do hope so.. lol

no com = no life. haha

hmm.. actually i'm pretty disappointed too.

but aint sure if we're on the same line.

hmm. apologies..

please see a doctor.

no matter what.

hope it doesnt deteriorates.

get well soon yar..

hmmm. a burden i see myself as.

adding on to all that are faced now.

please hang on.

nothing is impossible as the saying goes.

i'm getting increasingly demoralized.

results are not getting any better.

they are all heading downstream instead.

one after another it got worse.

hell.

just what the hell is wrong with me.

if this continues,

it wont be surprising if i were to take the supp paper.

kind of expected.

not that i desire though. who would?

demoralized.

losing all motivation.

alright great..

i just finished adding a few more slides to my part in mgen ppt.

and it took me the whole night to do it.

haha.

well well. actually i took breaks in between la. lol

ate supper, watched an episode of a show on youtube..

but doesnt matter.

no school tmr anyway.

haha!

hmmm.. ok so many things to do..

so many people are under so much stress.

so many people feel like giving up alr.

some even thought of dying.

(you know who you are)

dont be silly.

thats not going to help solve any problem.

it'll just bring more problems.

thats just an attempt to escape.

how can?

one must be brave to brave through the stormy seas.

eventually, the storm will cease.

everything will be fine.

hahaha

ok i dunno what the hell i'm talking alr.

loads of craps.

welll. guess i'm getting sleepy.

yawns*

hmmm. am looking forward to tmr.

hope it is for the better.

at least one of my problems will be solved.

heehee

alrights. i'm off to bed.

nightie night night!! =)

hmm.. abit weird.

somehow i see similarities.

hmmm.. coincidence perhaps? or not? hmm..

whatever. nvm..

hahah.

ahhhh.. it's so late now alr.

tmr's lesson at 9!

have to wake up at 7!

haix

oh btw, watched Harry Potter

hmmm. not very nice..

hahah

but still ok la. watchable. lol

oh and.. yay.. i got my adidas watch repaired!

just love it so much. =)

kk. off to bed time! nights!

=)

ahhhh.

been having a splitting headache since i woke up.

it still hurts like hell now.

it's really splitting my head into half already.

ahhhh.

it didnt really got any better after a three hours nap.

ahh.

hope it gets well soon.

cant afford to fall sick again at this point of time.

=(

WAH!! ARGHHHH!!

DAMN ANGRY AH!!!!!

stupid idiot school..

send me warning letter.

i submitted my mc ok!!

and it wrote there for 2 days! mind you!

idiot.. only take into account for one day.

must be cock eyed ah you all.

damn. anyhow sia..

fuck

damn angry now..

if it's confirmed that the mc wrote two days

i swear i'll make hell out of you ppl

idiots.

sorry readers. pardon my strong usage of words.

but i'm really angry now.

sorry

no. i wont be the least bit happy.

sorry for the unhappiness caused.

perhaps that should apply more to me..

sorry. i didnt meant to have made those happen.

perhaps i wasnt feeling at all right then.

cos of so many things that happened lately.

school work, family and stuff.

i'm really sorry.

it came down just so uncontrollably.

tried to hold it back though.

i can understand.

can tell you were feeling rather low.

yet i..

sorry. i totally agree that i'm blur.

dumb as well. i'm really sorry.

haix. die die. been so blur lately.

kept fogetting my medicine.

and like today, sian

promised juan to bring color pencils.

but forgot.

went to aap lec.

was late.

went in, took out my notes, pencil box..

"eh?!! where's my pencil box??!!"

turned out i forgot to bring.

no pens, no pencils.

it was then that i realise,

i cant live lec w/o my pencil box.

missed my pens and pencils so much.

lol

also another thing.

i didnt know the deadline of the sending of info was actually today instead of ytd.

so.. i rushed it through ytd and slept late.

and guess what?

i slept through almost the whole of lec.

haix

how can i be soooo blur??

wah. like that cannot ah. haix

how how?

haix

ok. again it is.

had a bad feeling today.

kept having the feeling that something's gonna happen.

and it did.

kept hoping things will go smoothly today.

but in the end.

haix.

i said someth wrong.

it's my bad.

my fault.

sorry!

gosh.

just what is wrong these few days.

haix.

so fed up these few days alr.

cos of sch work.

now....

haix.

my bad my bad.

just saw two persons using net to catch not sure a dog or cat.

dunno they're doing it for good deeds or bad stuff.

haix.

no mood to continue alr.

shall end.

can you just take me away? up there?

ahhh. goodness. now i feel so bad.

i didnt mean to make things seem like what it is now.

sorry sorry.

dont worry, things wont be made difficult.

i'm truly sorry.

i'm not trying to stop anything.

so please be as usual.

like how it has been all the while. =)

sorry if it has inflicted trouble or disturbance in you two.

sorry sorry.

oh and. happy birthday cheng! =D

alright. guess it's all my fault today.

sorry.

should have thought twice or thrice before doing anyth.

note taken.

sorry.

anw. transformers is nice.

worth watching.

it's not easy. i'm still learning. hard

but i'm starting to feel tired.

or perhaps i already am.

numbed

school ended at 12plus today.

slept at 3 the night before.

stayed up to finish studying urinary system.

in the end?

it was not tested for the quiz.

tested on integument instead.

sleeping time wasted. sian

ended up dozing off during lec.

the videos were so cool! haha

castration of animals! lol

ok went to play arcade with him at tm.

then he met up with his friends.

i met up with the same few for billiard.

plus wilson. lol

p6 classmates!

billiard was cool. hahah

then mac for dinner.

joking ard with the ma tong song by andy lau.

my dear toilet bowl! hahaha

hahah. went pool with jeremy and jiahui and liying.

hmmm.. liying didnt play though.

haha. sian. played so many rounds.

only managed to win once.

the last round. lol

ok la. it's been quite long since i played.

so it's not that bad after all. lol

then went to pp to acc him for dinner.

hmmm. eveything went fine.

sunshine after rain.

arhh.. i wan to attend NDP this year!

at marina bay!!

so cool can! lol